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When our time is up,
When our lives are done,
Will we say we've had our fun?
Will we make a mark,
This time.
Will we always say we tried.
Standing on the rooftops,
Everybody scream your heart out.
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Thursday, April 19, 2007, 3:31 AM
today is a happy worst day. sounds weird yeah? i know. you see, the 2 people that matters alot to me is the cause of this. ok a friend that i treasure alot is very upset/disappointed/pissed with me. and i honestly feel like shite about it. i'm at a loss. i want to apologise to her and tell her how sorry i am for hurting her but i dont have the guts to do that. why? because i feel guilty as hell. i was in the wrong for breaking a promise. i'm sorry that i didnt make an effort to compromise or make firm decisions. i dont want our friendship to end because of this. surely our friendship is stronger than that? so the question now is, what am i going to do to make it up to her. i shall discuss with the rest. hopefully she will accept our apology cause honestly, we had no idea it would hurt her that much. well we obviously overlooked the matter. i am praying to God that he will guide us in this matter and help us. if she doesnt forgive me, i think i would never forgive myself because really, she means alot to me and i really am sincerely sorry for hurting her.
now on to some happy stuff. because i've been feeling at a loss over this matter, the only person that can actually cheer me up is dear sweet poko. he doesnt have to do anything for me, all he has to do is just smile at me and my spirits would soar. at a time like this when friendships are going through a storm, i really need a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on. i do not wish to tell poko about this matter although i completely trust him, that is cause i see no reason as to why i should burden him with my problems. omg what is wrong with me? i'm looking at the picture of poko and me together and by right, i should feel happy right? but my heart still feels really heavy and i honestly feel like crying.
i cannot stand this, i need to make things clear with her. shit my eyes are stinging. ahhhhh poko, where are you??? oh fuck, i need a kleenex.
