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When our time is up,
When our lives are done,
Will we say we've had our fun?
Will we make a mark,
This time.
Will we always say we tried.
Standing on the rooftops,
Everybody scream your heart out.
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Tuesday, April 3, 2007, 3:50 AM
i'm feeling REALLY tired today. maybe it's because i hardly saw poko today=( anyway i feel like such a loser, stayed up late till about 12 last night to complete the damn pi and guess what? ms chok decided to extend the deadline to friday. urghhhhhh. so in class today, i was really sleepy and all. during religion class, i slept like a dead log. according to my friends, even when they shook me, i didnt budge. oh boy.
i feel so nervous and tense during lit tutorials. thank god it was jasmine tan today. if it were fahy, i would be minced meat. cause i was really yawning and all during class and my eyes were straining hard to stay open. jasmine tan goes really fast. she talks like a machine gun. i was praying hard in my head, "pls god, dont let her call me. pls pls pls dont call me." god answered my prayers! she looked at me a few times and i was damn sure she was going to call my name to answer her questions, but she didnt. haha! and she loves using bombastic words. here i am, rushing like mad to take down whatever that's coming out of her mouth. it would be so much easier if i didnt have to pause and think of how to spell the bombastic word that she just said. oh wells, i guess i'll get used to her eventually, the sooner the better!
after lit, i had the dreaded pe. after i changed, i was just sitting outside my class. i felt this insane urge to just cry. i really needed my sleep, and now i had to go attend physical training. my brain couldnt even think of a good enough reason to lie to mrs tan so i just went through the torturous pe lesson. we had to run 2 rounds, and 1 grand stand. that's considered 1 set. we did 3 sets in total. i think i mentioned this before but i really feel very self conscious when i run. i keep thinking that everyone (esp the guys) are looking and laughing at my ugly fat legs as i run. i wished i could just wear track pants to run, that would make me feel so much better but i'll probably just melt in them, what with the scorching sun and all. after completing the 3 sets, we had to practise our pull ups. girls had to do 20 incline pull ups. i hate pull ups! seriously, my arms are the weakest arms ever! they're so useless. i watch the girls, doing continuously the 10 pull ups. it's like so damn easy for them. as for me, i struggled like mad. i ended up doing 6 only. HAHAHAAHHA yes i suck. i need 7 to get a silver. hopefully i'll be able to formulate a way to cheat. haha! last year, i managed to cheat for my sit-and-reach. hahahaha. i used to be able to do 20 pull ups but that was in primary school. what has puberty done to me??? oh god. oh yes, then we did the chest jump thingy. i had the oddest feeling ever when i did the jumps! this probably sounds damn weird but when i jumped, i THOUGHT i felt my uh reproductive system moving. I KNOW YOU MUST THINK I AM NUTS BUT IT SERIOUSLY FELT LIKE THAT, I SWEAR. it felt like something inside my lower abdomen was moving. and what else is there besides my reproductive system?? yes there you go. and you know i keep thinking that the more i work out and tire myself, the less fertile i will be. i'm damn scared! i know this is all bullshit but urgh, i cant stop my over active mind from running wild sometimes.
had econs test today. I AM GOING TO FAIL IT. i felt like giving up halfway through the test, my brains just wasnt functioning properly. halfway through the test, i looked up at the ceiling and sighed. then i looked at my love declaration for poko on the table and i felt inspired to write more. HAHAHAHAHHA. i wonder if he has done his test yet. i'm sure he would ace it cause he is so very smart! haha. i think if he asked me how the test went, i wouldnt mind telling him everything that came out. but that will never happen cause he wouldnt ask me in the first place.he has integrity! haha. if he actually bothered to look hard enough, he would definitely realise that i like him. i'm always grinning like an idiot when i talk to him, and my cheeks get a little flushed. after our (very short) conversations, there would be a bounce in my step and i will actually giggle. yes, i need to control myself i know. haha!
after school, i hung out with bimbo in the library. tried to do history but it was an utter failure. then bev and anna came to meet us and we headed to the grand stand to chill for awhile. ok my fingers are getting tired now, shall go shower first then continue with history! go diane, you can do it!
